We're a heart attack away from losing the right to bear arms.
If your biggest tax deduction was bail money, you might be a redneck.
You might be a redneck if there are more than ten lawsuits currently pending against your dog.
You might be a redneck if motel 6 turns off the lights when they see you coming.
I don't know why my brain has kept all the words to the Gilligan's Island theme song and has deleted everything about triangles.
If most people wanted to be incognito, they put on a fake beard or mustache. If I wanted to I'd just shave mine off.