You might be a redneck if the Home Shopping Channel operator recognizes your voice.

You might be a redneck if you keep a fly swatter in the front seat of the car so you can reach your kids in the back seat of the car.

You might be a redneck if you have refused to watch the Academy Awards since Smokey and the Bandit was snubbed for best picture.

You might be a redneck if you refer to the time you won a free case of oil as the day my ship came in.

You might be a redneck if your grandfather completely executes the pull my finger trick at the family reunion.

You break into my house, I will shoot you. My wife will shoot you and then spend thirty minutes telling you why she shot you.

You might be a redneck if you prominently display a gift you bought at Graceland.