You might be a redneck if...your belt buckle weighs more than three pounds.

You might be a redneck if your father encourages you to quit school because Larry has an opening on the lube rack.

You might be a redneck if your pocketknife has ever been referred to as Exhibit A.

If you're a redneck, you have that blood flowing through your veins. That's almost on the bucket list, to hear "Freebird" live.

You might be a redneck if your momma gives you tips on how to sneak booze into sporting events.

Did you know babies are nauseated by the smell of a clean shirt? You put on something from the cleaners, they're gonna spit up just like that. My wardrobe looks like we have condors living in our yard.

You might be a redneck if during your senior year you and your mother had homeroom together.