You just may be a redneck if your lawn furniture used to be your living room furniture.

You might be a redneck if you've ever stared at a can of orange juice because it said concentrate.

You might be a redneck if you have refused to watch the Academy Awards since Smokey and the Bandit was snubbed for best picture.

My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a lot of effort into it. If they turn out bad, it means they took after her side of the family.

You might be a redneck if you celebrate Groundhog Day because you believe in it.

You might be a redneck if you're still scalping tickets after the concert is over.

You might be a redneck if... the blue book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas it has in it.