You might be a redneck if you think Silence of the Lambs is what happens when Larry walks out to the barn.

You might be a redneck if you entire family has ever sat around waiting for a call from the governor to spare a loved one.

I used to say that whenever people heard my Southern accent, they always wanted to deduct 100 IQ points.

My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a lot of effort into it. If they turn out bad, it means they took after her side of the family.

I don't know why my brain has kept all the words to the Gilligan's Island theme song and has deleted everything about triangles.

I don't necessarily think of it as Southern comedy. I just think I'm a comedian and I have a Southern accent.

You can call us rednecks if you want. We're not offended, 'cause we know what we're all about. We get up and go to work, we get up and go to church, and we get up and go to war when necessary.