The thing about that singles apartment is you never had to clean it up... until the day you got the security deposit back. You're arguing with the landlord... 'No sir, the back door was missing when we moved in here! The pizzas were always on the ceiling!'

You might be a redneck if you dated your daddy's current wife in high school.

You might be a redneck if more than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general.

You just may be a redneck if your lawn furniture used to be your living room furniture.

You might be a redneck if your vehicle has a two-tone paint job - primer red and primer gray.

You might be a redneck if your handkerchief doubles as your shirt sleeve.

You might be a redneck if your favorite T-shirt is offensive in thirteen states.