If someone at Fleet Farm offers you assistance and they don't work there you might live in Wisconsin.

You might be a redneck if your kids are going hungry tonight because you just had to have those Yosemite Sam mud flaps.

You might be a redneck if during your senior year you and your mother had homeroom together.

You might be a redneck if when you run out of gas, you put gin in the gas tank.

You might be a redneck if you are still holding on to Confederate money because you think the South will rise again.

Buying a used rental car is kind of like going to a house of ill repute looking for a wife. Anything that's been driven that hard by that many people, you really don't want to put your key in it.

I hope someday we can stamp out illiteracy in America. Of course you'll have to kill alot of my relatives to do it.