Have you ever seen people so ugly that you have to get someone else to verify it?
You might be a redneck if you need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.
You might be a redneck if you think a chain saw is a musical instrument.
You might be a redneck if the UFO hotline limits you to one call a day.
You might be a redneck if during your senior year you and your mother had homeroom together.
Did you know babies are nauseated by the smell of a clean shirt? You put on something from the cleaners, they're gonna spit up just like that. My wardrobe looks like we have condors living in our yard.