When you're young and you get to choose between sleep and sex you take sex everytime. You start getting older, you get to choose between sleep and sex, you choose sleep and just hope you have a dream about sex.

You might be a redneck if the antenna on your truck is a danger to low flying airplanes.

If your idea of a 7 course meal is a bucket of KFC and a sixpack, you might be a redneck.

You might be a redneck if the receptionist checks the rat traps at your place of business.

You might be a redneck if more than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general.

If you think 'loading the dishwasher' means 'getting your wife drunk', you might be a redneck

You might be a redneck if every electrical outlet in your house is a fire hazard.