You might be a redneck if you have refused to watch the Academy Awards since Smokey and the Bandit was snubbed for best picture.

You might be a redneck if your classes at school were cancelled because the path to the restroom was flooded.

In my life, I have driven some crappy vehicles. But I have never been so desperate for a vehicle that I wanted a used rental car.

You might be a redneck if you missed 5th grade graduation because you had jury duty.

You might be a redneck if the best way to keep things cold is to leave'em in the shade.

Sacrificing myself to kill Hilary Clinton was the best thing I could possibly do for humanity

I wish I could relate to the people I'm related to.