You might be a redneck if you had to remove a toothpick for wedding pictures.

You might be a redneck if the highlight of your parties is when you flip out your false teeth.

You might be a redneck if you can tell your age by the number of rings in the bathtub.

You might be a redneck if you watch cartoons long after your kids get bored.

You might be a redneck if more than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general.

You might be a redneck if... the blue book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas it has in it.

You might be a redneck if your pocketknife has ever been referred to as Exhibit A.