I refuse to this day to do e-mail because everybody I know that does it, it takes another two or three hours a day. I don't want to give two or three more hours away.

You might be a redneck if you consider a good tan to be the back of your neck and the left arm below the shirt sleeve.

You might be a redneck if you've ever hauled a can of paint to the top of a water tower to defend your sister's honor.

I was talking to Alan Jackson. He had his second Greatest Hits album. He said, You don't ever get into this really thinking you're gonna make it.

You might be a redneck if every electrical outlet in your house is a fire hazard.

Some people like to keep their grass cut really short, so they can see the intruders coming. Keep those kill zones open. I say let the grass grow tall so they don't know there's a house behind it. Some call it lazy, I say it's thinking.

Little girls love dolls. They just don't love dolls clothes