You might be a redneck if you dated your daddy's current wife in high school.

Look at where Jesus went to pick people. He didn't go to the colleges; he got guys off the fishing docks.

You might be a redneck if there are more than ten lawsuits currently pending against your dog.

You might be a redneck if you saved lots of money on your honeymoon by going deer hunting.

You might be a redneck if your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.

You might be a redneck if your grandmother has ever been asked to leave a bingo game because of her language.

Sophisticated people invest their money in stock portfolios. Rednecks invest their money in commemorative plates.