You might be a redneck if you dated your daddy's current wife in high school.

As a comic, you learn to use your voice because you don't have the benefit of visual things.

Any job that posts a price list for your body parts is a bad job.

You might be a redneck if in an effort to watch your cholesterol, you eat Spam Lite.

You might be a redneck if a full-grown ostrich has fewer feathers than your cowboy hat.

You might be a redneck if you consider a good tan to be the back of your neck and the left arm below the shirt sleeve.

You might be a redneck if your momma tore her best dress coon hunting.