Look at where Jesus went to pick people. He didn't go to the colleges; he got guys off the fishing docks.

If your biggest tax deduction was bail money, you might be a redneck.

You might be a redneck if you go Christmas shopping for your mom, sister, and girlfriend, and you only need to buy one gift.

I say, If everybody in this house lives where it's God first, friends and family second and you third, we won't ever have an argument.

You know, I remember Career Day in high school. I remember plumbers and lawyers... I don't remember a booth where you could sign up to learn how to shoot chickens out of a cannon at the windshield of an airplane, 'cause there would have been a line at my school to do that!

You may be a redneck if... your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

You might be a redneck if when you run out of gas, you put gin in the gas tank.