Whatever cleaning goes on on the planet, women do 99% of it. But see, women are not as proud of their 99% as men are of our one! We clean something up, we're gonna talk about it all year long. It might be on the news, you don't know. A woman could be out re-paving the driveway. Men actually have enough gall to run out on the porch and go "Hey baby? Man, it's hot as hell out here, ain't it! Look, don't worry about emptyin' that ashtray in the den, I done got it, all right? Did it for you, sweet pea. I'm gonna go take a nap now, all right?"

You might be a redneck if you think the Mountain Men in Deliverance were just misunderstood.

You might be a redneck if every electrical outlet in your house is a fire hazard.

You might be a redneck if you go Christmas shopping for your mom, sister, and girlfriend, and you only need to buy one gift.

Children that play outside develop better problem solving skills and have a stronger ability to work within a group.

I wish I could relate to the people I'm related to.

You might be a redneck if you've ever stared at a can of orange juice because it said concentrate.