Please don't get me wrong here. I'm not making fun of old people. In fact I think that's the goal of everybody here tonite. We all want to be an old person someday.

I don't necessarily think of it as Southern comedy. I just think I'm a comedian and I have a Southern accent.

I wish I could relate to the people I'm related to.

You might be a redneck if you have to check in the bottom of your shoe for change so you can get Grandma a new plug of tobacco.

You might be a redneck if you look upon a family reunion as a chance to meet 'Ms. Right

My grandma's the most careful, safe driver in the world. You put her in a rental car, and she's doing doughnuts in the K-Mart parking lot!

You might be a redneck if your daughter's Barbie's Dream House has a clothesline in the front yard.