Please don't get me wrong here. I'm not making fun of old people. In fact I think that's the goal of everybody here tonite. We all want to be an old person someday.

You might be a redneck if your classes at school were cancelled because the path to the restroom was flooded.

You might be a redneck if you have a picture of Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, or Elvis over your fireplace.

To me, the media in New York and LA have always missed the essence of this country.

You might be a redneck if you think the Mountain Men in Deliverance were just misunderstood.

You might be a redneck if your dog can't watch you eat without gagging.

You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather.