You find out that all this stuff you've accumulated, you could care less about it. It's just the relationships that matter.

You might be a redneck if your good deed for the month was hiding your brother for a few days.

I've got nothing against tattoos. I don't have one myself. If I did, it would be right there next to my watch. It would say "Your wife's birthday is August 2nd, your anniversary is September 18th, don't let Ron White drive your car again."

I always wore cowboy boots and drove a truck, and talked like this. So everywhere I would go in comedy people would say, "Foxworthy, you ain't nothing but a redneck from Georgia!" It kind of became a formula joke.

Because criminals know that when they see a house with 2 foot tall grass, a dog on a chain, and an engine hanging from a tree, a gun lives in that house. And if you want to know what kind, just break in at 2 in the morning.

You might be a redneck if you prominently display a gift you bought at Graceland.

You might be a redneck if your dog can't watch you eat without gagging.