You might be a redneck if your grandmother can correctly execute the sleeper hold.

You might be a redneck if you think the O.J. trial was the big Sunkist and Minutemaid taste test.

It's like cuddling with a Butterball turkey.

You might be a redneck if you see a sign that says Say No To Crack and it reminds you to pull your jeans up.

You might be a redneck if getting a package from your post office requires a full tank of gas in the truck.

If your biggest tax deduction was bail money, you might be a redneck.

You just may be a redneck if your lawn furniture used to be your living room furniture.