People would say, Can we develop a sitcom around you? and I would say, Not interested. I'm very happy doing standup and writing and taking my kids to school.

You might be a redneck if taking your wife on a cruise means circling the Dairy Queen.

You might be a redneck if your 'huntin dog' cost more than the truck you drive him around in.

I'm two decisions away from putting up drywall for a living. I am, and there's nothing wrong with that, but whatever I got, it's through the grace of God, and I've got to use it right.

You might be a redneck if you keep a fly swatter in the front seat of the car so you can reach your kids in the back seat of the car.

You might be a redneck if your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.

If you have ever spray-painted your girlfriends name on an overpass, you might be a redneck.