My whole career can be summed up with 'Ignorance is bliss.' When you do not know better, you do not really worry about failing.

I tried real hard to play golf, and I was so bad at it they would have to check me for ticks at the end of the round because I'd spent about half the day in the woods.

You might be a redneck if your satellite dish payment delays buying school clothes for the kids.

If most people wanted to be incognito, they put on a fake beard or mustache. If I wanted to I'd just shave mine off.

If your idea of a 7 course meal is a bucket of KFC and a sixpack, you might be a redneck.

You might be a redneck if you've ever worn a dress that is strapless with a bra that isn't.

You might be a redneck if you've ever hauled a can of paint to the top of a water tower to defend your sister's honor.