My father-in-law gets up at 5 o'clock in the morning and watches the Discovery Channel. I don't know why there's this big rush to do this.

If you think the last four words to the national anthem are " gentleman, start your engines", You might be a redneck.

What I hated was doing what somebody in LA thought Jeff Foxworthy ought to do.

You might be a redneck if you own all the components of soap on a rope except the soap.

I actually had a chance to be in Delta Farce, but I couldn't do it because I read the script.

You might be a redneck if people hear your car long before they see it.

We're a heart attack away from losing the right to bear arms.