You might be a redneck if you give your dad a gallon of Pepto-Bismol for his birthday.

You might be a redneck if your coffee table used to be a telephone cable spool.

You might be a redneck if you have to check in the bottom of your shoe for change so you can get Grandma a new plug of tobacco.

You might be a redneck if your parakeet knows the phrase Open up, Police!

You moon the wrong person at an office party and suddenly you're not 'professional' any more.

When you get to your third millionth frequent flyer mile, I think something snaps in your brain.

I just love people. I love this country. I am the American dream. I grew up by the airport with a dirt yard. Never in my life should I have been a success. So that's what I love about this country [USA], is you get out there and you have the opportunity and you work hard at it, and you can be a success.