You might be a redneck if when you leave your house, you are followed by federal agents of the Bureau of Alcohol Tobacco and Firearms, and the only thing you worry about is if you can lose them or not.
Jeff FoxworthyIf your thighs look like the hood of a white Toyota minivan after a hailstorm, you aren't juicy.
Jeff FoxworthyYou moon the wrong person at an office party and suddenly you're not 'professional' any more.
Jeff Foxworthy