You might be a redneck if the dog catcher calls for a backup unit when he visits your house.

As a comedian I appreciate every kind of comedy. You decide for yourself what you're going to do.

If you're a redneck, you have that blood flowing through your veins. That's almost on the bucket list, to hear "Freebird" live.

If you're a man and you've ever been antique shopping during a big football game, you're either gay or married.

You might be a redneck if the highlight of your parties is when you flip out your false teeth.

You might be a redneck if your biggest ambition in life is to git that big ole coon. The one what hangs 'round over yonder, back'ah Bubba's barn.

I say, If everybody in this house lives where it's God first, friends and family second and you third, we won't ever have an argument.