You may be a redneck if... you have spent more on your pickup truck than on your education.

You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it.

A lot of people up North, they think everybody from the South is married to their sister and has seen a UFO. I told them, 'I'm just dating my sister and couldn't swear that it wasn't a weather balloon.'

You might be a redneck if you think Silence of the Lambs is what happens when Larry walks out to the barn.

By the time we get to church, I need church cuz I've been yelled at by everyone in the family.

You might be a redneck if your favorite T-shirt is offensive in thirteen states.

You might be a redneck if the highlight of your parties is when you flip out your false teeth.