You might be a redneck if you're turned on by a woman who can field dress a deer.

It's a weird sensation to be mad and learning at the same time.

I notice my wife when she's on the phone with her friends, man they will share every animate details of their lives with each other. See men once we become friends with another man we may never say another word to him, unless there's valuable information that needs to be exchanged. Things like "Hey Jim, your shirt's on fire."

You might be a redneck if getting a package from your post office requires a full tank of gas in the truck.

My father-in-law gets up at 5 o'clock in the morning and watches the Discovery Channel. I don't know why there's this big rush to do this.

You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather.

You might be a redneck if you keep a fly swatter in the front seat of the car so you can reach your kids in the back seat of the car.