You break into my house, I will shoot you. My wife will shoot you and then spend thirty minutes telling you why she shot you.

You might be a redneck if the antenna on your truck is a danger to low flying airplanes.

You might be a redneck if the tobacco chewers in your family aren't just men.

Little girls love dolls. They just don't love doll clothes. We've got four thousand dolls and ain't one of them got a stitch of clothes on.

You might be a redneck if your kids are going hungry tonight because you just had to have those Yosemite Sam mud flaps.

Find something in life that you love doing. If you make a lot of money, that's a bonus, and if you don't, you still won't hate going to work.

You just may be a redneck if your lawn furniture used to be your living room furniture.