You might be a redneck if when you run out of gas, you put gin in the gas tank.

A lot of people up North, they think everybody from the South is married to their sister and has seen a UFO. I told them, 'I'm just dating my sister and couldn't swear that it wasn't a weather balloon.'

You might be a redneck if you have a picture of Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, or Elvis over your fireplace.

You might be a redneck if your 'huntin dog' cost more than the truck you drive him around in.

You might be a redneck if your kids are going hungry tonight because you just had to have those Yosemite Sam mud flaps.

There's no down time any more.

As a comic, you learn to use your voice because you don't have the benefit of visual things.