You might be a redneck if you think that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major food groups.

The more excited the rooster gets, the higher his voice goes. He's got a little bit of a Barney Fife quality to him.

You might be a redneck if your daughter's Barbie's Dream House has a clothesline in the front yard.

You might be a redneck if you missed 5th grade graduation because you had jury duty.

You might be a redneck if you go to a Tupperware party for a haircut.

You don't get married to get sex. Getting married to get sex is like buying a 747 to get free peanuts.

You might be a redneck if you see a sign that says Say No To Crack and it reminds you to pull your jeans up.