You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't.

You break into my house, I will shoot you. My wife will shoot you and then spend thirty minutes telling you why she shot you.

You might be a redneck if you think that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major food groups.

You might be a redneck if your most expensive shoes have numbers on the heels.

If men have a smell it's usually an accident.

You might be a redneck if a full-grown ostrich has fewer feathers than your cowboy hat.

To me, the media in New York and LA have always missed the essence of this country.