All these years I've sat in airports and kind of drawn people and put like Far Side captions on them.

You might be a redneck if you're a lite beer drinker, because you start drinking when it gets light.

We're a heart attack away from losing the right to bear arms.

I love comedy. God has given me this platform.

You might be a redneck if your coffee table used to be a telephone cable spool.

I turned down a movie this summer because it was nine weeks in Vancouver and my oldest daughter is 14. I've got four more summers with her. I'm not giving away nine weeks of her summer to go do a silly movie.

You might be a redneck if your father encourages you to quit school because Larry has an opening on the lube rack.