You might be a redneck if you look upon a family reunion as a chance to meet 'Ms. Right

You might be a redneck if you consider a good tan to be the back of your neck and the left arm below the shirt sleeve.

My wife is like, You finally get your own TV show, you can have any kind of car you want and you get a darned truck. But my brother and I have the same kind of truck now.

You may be a redneck if... your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

Did you know babies are nauseated by the smell of a clean shirt? You put on something from the cleaners, they're gonna spit up just like that. My wardrobe looks like we have condors living in our yard.

Buying a used rental car is kind of like going to a house of ill repute looking for a wife. Anything that's been driven that hard by that many people, you really don't want to put your key in it.

You might be a redneck if you celebrate Groundhog Day because you believe in it.