You might be a redneck if your parakeet knows the phrase Open up, Police!

You might be a redneck if you won't stop at a rest area if you have an empty beer can in the car.

You might be a redneck if your mother has been involved in a fist fight at a high school sports event.

You might be a redneck if your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.

We probably stagnate our children's emotional growth by not letting them have some separation from us.

You might be a redneck if you have refused to watch the Academy Awards since Smokey and the Bandit was snubbed for best picture.

[about sex and being married] It's like being the National Guard, we may not be seeing as much action as the front line, but we are living to fight another day.