If your neighbors think you're a detective because a cop always brings you home, you might be a redneck.

You might be a redneck if you've ever stolen toilet paper from a public restroom.

Did you know babies are nauseated by the smell of a clean shirt? You put on something from the cleaners, they're gonna spit up just like that. My wardrobe looks like we have condors living in our yard.

I was talking to Alan Jackson. He had his second Greatest Hits album. He said, You don't ever get into this really thinking you're gonna make it.

In my life, I have driven some crappy vehicles. But I have never been so desperate for a vehicle that I wanted a used rental car.

Nothing in life prepares you to be famous.

You might be a redneck if you keep a fly swatter in the front seat of the car so you can reach your kids in the back seat of the car.