If your neighbors think you're a detective because a cop always brings you home, you might be a redneck.

You might be a redneck if you dated your daddy's current wife in high school.

Every generation thinks they invented sex, which is the stupidest assumption in the world because if that was the case, you wouldn't even be here.

You might be a redneck if more than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general.

I don't know why my brain has kept all the words to the Gilligan's Island theme song and has deleted everything about triangles.

You might be a redneck if the richest member of your family bought a house and you have to help take the wheels off of it.

You might be a redneck if your father encourages you to quit school because Larry has an opening on the lube rack.