I'm an outdoor nut. If I'm not working, I'm on a tractor on my farm, hunting, fishing or climbing a mountain.

When you get to your third millionth frequent flyer mile, I think something snaps in your brain.

You might be a redneck if people hear your car long before they see it.

I talked to Larry the Cable Guy the other day. Larry's made more money than 10 people should ever make in a lifetime. He was excited because he'd gone over to the livestock auction and bought 20 new feeder pigs.

We probably stagnate our children's emotional growth by not letting them have some separation from us.

You take a normal guy, give him a wife, give them time, and you've got AN IDIOT!

A lot of people up North, they think everybody from the South is married to their sister and has seen a UFO. I told them, 'I'm just dating my sister and couldn't swear that it wasn't a weather balloon.'