You might be a redneck if your grandmother has ever been asked to leave a bingo game because of her language.

You might be a redneck if a full-grown ostrich has fewer feathers than your cowboy hat.

I'm two decisions away from putting up drywall for a living. I am, and there's nothing wrong with that, but whatever I got, it's through the grace of God, and I've got to use it right.

You might be a redneck if your grandfather completely executes the pull my finger trick at the family reunion.

You might be a redneck if your primary source of income is the pawn shop.

You might be a redneck if the dog catcher calls for a backup unit when he visits your house.

My whole career can be summed up with 'Ignorance is bliss.' When you do not know better, you do not really worry about failing.