You may be a redneck if... your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

You might be a redneck if your parakeet knows the phrase Open up, Police!

You might be a redneck if you move your refrigerator and the grass underneath it has turned yellow.

You might be a redneck if you are still holding on to Confederate money because you think the South will rise again.

Do you know why it's so hard to solve a Redneck murder? 'Cause there's no dental records and all the DNA is the same.

You might be a redneck if... the blue book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas it has in it.

You might be a redneck if on your first date you had to ask your Dad to borrow the keys to the tractor.