You might be a redneck if your pocketknife has ever been referred to as Exhibit A.

You might be a redneck if an episode of Walker, Texas Ranger changed your life.

People would say, Can we develop a sitcom around you? and I would say, Not interested. I'm very happy doing standup and writing and taking my kids to school.

You might be a redneck if...your belt buckle weighs more than three pounds.

We really didn't have the option of being couch potatoes when I was growing up. There were only three television channels and the only kid's programming was on Saturday morning. We always played outside until we could hear Mom calling us (not by cell phone but with her hands cupped around her mouth) that it was dinner time.

If the veins in the back of your legs look like the street map of greater Pittsburgh, you ain't nobody's babydoll.

You might be a redneck if someone tells you you have something in your teeth, and you take them out to see what it is.