I got my wife a mood ring. It works real good! When shes in a good mood it turns blue, but when shes in a bad mood theres a red mark across my forehead

You might be a redneck if you prominently display a gift you bought at Graceland.

You might be a redneck if your favorite Christmas present was a painting on black velvet.

If you think fast food is hittin a deer att 65 miles per hr.. you might be a redneck

I was talking to Alan Jackson. He had his second Greatest Hits album. He said, You don't ever get into this really thinking you're gonna make it.

You might be a redneck if your beer can collection is considered a tourist attraction in your home town.

You might be a redneck if you refer to the time you won a free case of oil as the day my ship came in.