You might be a redneck if you are still holding on to Confederate money because you think the South will rise again.

You might be a redneck if you think that the styrofoam cooler is the greatest invention of all time.

You might be a redneck if your grandmother has ever been asked to leave a bingo game because of her language.

You might be a redneck if your anniversary present was getting the septic tank pumped.

My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a lot of effort into it. If they turn out bad, it means they took after her side of the family.

You might be a redneck if you prominently display a gift you bought at Graceland.

You find out that all this stuff you've accumulated, you could care less about it. It's just the relationships that matter.