You might be a redneck if you were shooting pool when your kids were born.

You might be a redneck if the receptionist checks the rat traps at your place of business.

You might be a redneck if directions to your house include turn off the paved road.

You might be a redneck if your satellite dish payment delays buying school clothes for the kids.

You might be a redneck if you've ever worn a dress that is strapless with a bra that isn't.

You might be a redneck if you refer to the time you won a free case of oil as the day my ship came in.

Sophisticated people invest their money in stock portfolios. Rednecks invest their money in commemorative plates.