You might be a redneck if somebody hollers ho-down and your girlfriend hits the floor.

I notice my wife when she's on the phone with her friends, man they will share every animate details of their lives with each other. See men once we become friends with another man we may never say another word to him, unless there's valuable information that needs to be exchanged. Things like "Hey Jim, your shirt's on fire."

You might be a redneck if you prominently display a gift you bought at Graceland.

You might be a redneck if more than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general.

You might be a redneck if the dog catcher calls for a backup unit when he visits your house.

You might be a redneck if your classes at school were cancelled because the path to the restroom was flooded.

You might be a redneck if you have flowers planted in a bathroom appliance in your front yard.