I've gotten to the point I won't even watch the 11 o'clock news. You just walk away from it thinking how bad everything is.

You might be a redneck if you wish your outhouse was as nice as those at the state park.

You might be a redneck if your vehicle has a two-tone paint job - primer red and primer gray.

If you have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say Kool Whip on the side, you might be a redneck.

You might be a redneck if it's easier to spray weed killer on your lawn than mow it.

Pride is the first step in people unraveling and companies unraveling and relationships unraveling.

You might be a redneck if the tobacco chewers in your family aren't just men.