You might be a redneck if you can amuse yourself for more than an hour with a fly swatter.

You might be a redneck if you're moved to tears every time you hear Dolly Parton singing I Will Always Love You.

You might be a redneck if you have started a petition to change the National Anthem to Georgia on My Mind.

Did you know babies are nauseated by the smell of a clean shirt?

The only negative about doing stand-up is that you're on the road by yourself. When you're on the road with comics we just crack each other up every night going, "Can you believe they're paying us to do this? They're crazy.

I've got keys to crap I've never owned. You put all my keys together I could be a high school janitor tonight.

You might be a redneck if you prominently display a gift you bought at Graceland.