If there's one thing I learned from Rodrick, it's to set people's expectations real low so you end up surprising them by practically doing nothing at all.

I labored for eight years thinking that I was writing a book for adults that was a nostalgic look back on childhood. Then my publisher informed me I'd written a children's book.

Back in those days it was just me swimming around in the dark, doing back flips and taking naps whenever I want.

I didn't really know what to expect from detention but when I waked into the room, the first thought I had was, I don't belong in here with these future criminals.

I'll be famous one day, but for now I'm stuck in middle school with a bunch of morons." - Greg Heffley.

My advice to authors would be to try to do something original rather than to try to anticipate what the market is looking for.

I'm probably something like 95% chicken nugget