Chirag: Rowley, do you think I exist? Rowley: Nope! I can't even hear you or see you!

I'll be famous one day, but for now I'm stuck in middle school with a bunch of morons." - Greg Heffley.

The best person I know is Myself.

First of all, let me get this straight: This is a JOURNAL, not a diary. I know what it says on the cover, but when Mom went out to buy this thing I SPECIFICALLY told her to get one that didn't say 'diary' on it.

... no matter how nice you are to some people, they'll turn their back on you the second they get the chance.

I labored for eight years thinking that I was writing a book for adults that was a nostalgic look back on childhood. Then my publisher informed me I'd written a children's book.

Greg starts a middle school and asks: Why is "bullies" such a big PROBLEM? And says people need to shave twice a day.