Americans are good at herding Bison. The end.

Driving most supercars is like trying to manhandle a cow up a back staircase, but this is like smearing honey onto Keira Knightley.

Speed has never killed anyone. Suddenly becoming stationary, that's what gets you.

If I like somebody else's tribe I'm going to promote the hell out of it. The whole thing is a democracy, and if somebody's more popular then good luck to them.

Like every big organisation these days, the BBC is obsessed with the wellbeing of those who set foot on its premises. Studios must display warning notices if there is real glass on the set, and the other day I was presented with a booklet explaining how to use a door. I am not kidding.

The Suzuki Wagon R should be avoided like unprotected sex with an Ethiopian transvestite

This is perfect for India because everyone who comes here gets the trots.