When you've finished using a car, put the f***ing seat back, so humans can use it afterwards.

Whenever I’m suffering from insomnia, I just look at a picture of a Toyota Camry and I’m straight off.

Now we get quite a lot of complaints that we don't feature enough affordable cars on the show so we'll kick off tonight with the cheapest Ferrari of them all!

I'm a horse of a man!

All this health and safety talk is just killing me.

The only person to ever look good in the back of a 4-seater convertible was Adolf Hitler

Racing cars which have been converted for road use never really work. It's like making a hard core adult film, and then editing it so that it can be shown in British hotels. You'd just end up with a sort of half hour close up of some bloke's sweaty face.