You lost weight? Look around, you'll find it.

When David killed Goliath, Mae Young called the cops.

I asked Sunny if she would ever consider dating you. She said she would rather give birth to a porcupine on fire.

As a baby, Bret Hart was so ugly that they had to put tinted windows on his incubator!

I'm an artist and I can draw very well. I'm amazed that everybody can't draw well because I can do it so effortlessly.

You know how I impress girls at the gym? I do pull ups: I pull up in a Corvette, in a Cadillac, and in a Mercedes.

Ahmed Johnson came from a neighborhood where the most common words heard was, You have the right to remain silent.