I am trying to release endorphins here. I am not preaching to you - I am trying to make you laugh.

After a gig I always head back to the hotel, remembering granny's words of wisdom. I cancel the late-night pizza and watch the Jonathan Ross show instead.

You never want to be the grumpy guy, although I do have quite a grumpy face.

I was in the South of France. I saw a Brownie on a school trip. She was holding up a book. It said on the front 'rough guide'. I thought: 'Yeah' she's not a looker.

Ten years after the Chernobyl accident, and am I the only one that's disappointed? Still no superheros.

My dad's dying wish was to have his family around him. I can't help thinking he would have been better off with more oxygen.

More people are going out to comedy shows than they were before.