Viagra has instructions: 'Keep away from children' - what kind of man do you think I am?
A big girl once came up to me after a show and said "I think you're fatist." I said "No, no. I think you're fattest."
I may be middle class, but I'm hard. 'Al dente', you could say.
See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil. Rohypnol
I go around the country and do a simple gag like, 'The property ladder is now a snake' and get a real laugh.
British scientists have demonstrated that cigarettes can harm your children. Fair enough. Use an ashtray!